It is easy to think that stress and how you cope is “other people’s” fault or due to outside influences but I want you to consider that this may not be the whole truth.
Things happen in life – both good, “bad” and indifferent.
How you PERCEIVE this will then determine what actions you take though. It is the reaction to an event which will then determine whether you experience the “thing” as a threat and stress or something of little importance or something positive.
Why am I writing about this and why does it effect you? Well things will happen whatever wishes you may have or not!
What I want you to realise is that when you CHOOSE how you react to any event you get to have some power over it, rather “it” having power and dominion over you. This does not mean that you do not react or are not upset (this may be appropriate) but that you can have it BE just the way it is or isn’t.
Let me give you an example:
You are busy trying to sort out your home and belongings – having a big clear through and de-clutter with a deadline. In amongst everything you find a forgotten but emotionally important treasure e.g. a collection of photos.
You could immediately get very upset that this time has passed, or the people in the photos are no longer alive etc or it depicts another reason for upset. This becomes the all-consuming emotion; and you decide that can’t continue with the sorting out.
Can you see how this upset and the following decision is NOT about the object but about your reaction to the object.
As such – you can put the photos to one side to deal with later but continue with the task in hand… because YOU decided to.
You could perceive the photos as distressing, or just as photos from the past or something else.
Ultimately though they are just photos. Bits of images on some paper…!
The level of emotional and mental involvement – the stress which you attribute to them in in fact down to you.
In that moment you can choose how to react. How to feel. What to express, or not.
Therefore, STRESS is an “inside” job. A choice to experience happiness or sadness; frustration or any other emotion – in that moment of time! YOU get to decide that – or even change your mind and choose another emotion which serves you better!
If you have found this useful – why not pass it onto a friend who may not be dealing successfully with the levels of anxiety or “stress” in their lives right now? Having a new perspective and new choices can bring about a whole new world to experience.
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